God Assisted Childbirth

Tonight we went to Gargano's... it's this super-rich Italian place that is absolute gastrointestinal hell but totally worth it. Last time I went was when I was pregnant with Boo, and my water broke just at 24 hours later and I had him the next day. I'm obviously hoping for a similar effect this time, not to mention the manicotti was excellent.

Anyway, on the ride home I was looking at Boo, and looking at the empty car seat in the center of the back seat (I sit back there with him still, except now I'm further away than I used to be. I can't sit in the middle because it's a lap-only belt). And I realized that, any day now, it would actually be used for something other than holding sippy cups and baby carriers (and I'd have to find somewhere else to stash those things!). Boo likes to take the adjuster strap (that tightens the harness) of 2e's seat and play "cell phone" with it. It's super cute. And in a few days, that strap will be just a little bit shorter because there will be something actually IN the harness. It seems so unreal.

Sometimes I think I'm going to be pregnant forever, and that I'm not really having a baby, I'm just growing a belly and it's going to shrink back down like a swollen ankle or something. I know, weird. It just doesn't seem real at all yet. I have an entire stash of newborn diapers, a collection of cute baby carriers (although I DO still use them for Boo... yes, even at 40 weeks pregnant...), another car seat in the car, all the birth stuff... and still it doesn't seem like it's ever going to happen. It seems like home decor (or car decor!). But every now and then I'll look at something and just KNOW that it's real, and I'll have that "awww" moment.

Tonight was one of those moments. We were riding home, and I was feeling the inside of the baby's car seat, which is so soft that I want one too, darn it! I was sitting there picturing what it would look like with a new baby in it... and what the new baby would look like. I have no idea! I think 2e will be a little bigger than Boo was, probably a little bit of dark hair, and bright blue-gray eyes like Boo used to have. A big pudgy face and super-long fingers and toes. But I don't know! The suspense is killing me!

I keep wondering how I'll go into labor, too. I mean, contractions obviously mean nothing. Maybe my water will break first again, although I'm actually hoping it won't because it's just so much messier and makes contractions that much harder, hehe. For the past few evenings, for a few hours every evening, I've basically been at that place that makes most people wonder, "Should I go to the hospital yet?" But I know it's not labor-labor. I can still breathe, talk, and type through all contractions, and more importantly, I can still smile and joke between them. It's not quite as bad as true prodromal labor, but it is just enough to piss me off!!

Anyway, someone send 2e the message through morse code... we're ready. Yeah, the Nekkie Blankie isn't here yet, but we can do a few days without if we need to. Everything else is here and ready. It's safe, it's peaceful, Mama promises to put a note on the door telling everyone to stay OUT. The water is warm, the milk is good, and the love is already growing. So come on out!!

Boudreaux already loves you, baby!